Living Well

Six Ways to Boost Your Confidence at Work

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Confident_Guy

Some people are just naturally confident. They feel proud of the work they do and the things they accomplish on the job.

Other people have a harder time believing in themselves. They might do excellent work, but they still have doubts about their skills and competencies. If you fall into this second category, here are six ways that you can banish your concerns and boost your confidence:

  1. Tell people when you’ll get a task done and then meet that deadline. You’ll feel good about what you accomplished, and this will help to increase your feelings of confidence. And it will make other people respect your skills and abilities.
  2. Speak up. During meetings, you don’t have to talk constantly or dominate conversations. But when you feel like you have something valuable to say, say it! The more practice you get in this area, the more comfortable you’ll be speaking in front of your bosses and coworkers – and the more confident you’ll feel.
  3. Learn how to deal with criticism. We all get criticized occasionally, and it can be hard to take. But criticism really can be beneficial. You just need to stay calm, not get defensive, listen to what’s being said, and gather more information if necessary. If you determine that your manager’s criticism is valid, try to change your behavior. And most of all – don’t let it shake your confidence. Don’t obsess over what was said. Instead, try to focus on all the strengths and skills that you have to offer.
  4. Get some additional training. If you feel like your knowledge is lacking in certain areas, seek out additional training. As you learn more, your confidence (and competence) will grow!
  5. Smile and be peppy. Confident people actually do smile more often than those who lack confidence. And they walk in a peppy manner. So if you can do those things, you’ll look more confident, other people will think you’re confident, and this, in turn, will help to make you feel more confident!
  6. Spend time with encouraging friends and/or coworkers. Nothing builds up your confidence more than being around people who support you, remind you of your strengths, console you (when necessary), and encourage you.

 

Brandon, J. (2014, October 6). 10 ways to build your confidence at work. Inc. Retrieved from http://www.inc.com/john-brandon/10-ways-to-build-your-confidence-at-work.html

 

Being Grateful

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Happy_Guy

Want to be happier? Healthier? Get a better night’s sleep? No problem! Just be grateful for the things you have.

A growing body of research suggests that feelings of gratitude can have lasting, beneficial effects on people’s mental and physical health. Studies have found that when people spend time focusing on the things that they’re grateful for, they experience the following:

  • Reduced feelings of stress
  • Increased sense of well-being
  • Increased feelings of satisfaction
  • Improved resilience
  • Better, more restful sleep
  • Increased desire to exercise and help others

So go ahead and make a list of the things that you’re thankful for. You might even want to read the list out loud, or stick it on your fridge so you see it regularly. You’ll be grateful you did!

 

Pinker, S. (2015, December 19-20). An Attitude of Gratitude Brings Better Health. The Wall Street Journal, p. C2.

 

The Importance of Resilience

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Resilient_Plant

Resilience is the ability to deal with change. It’s the ability to recover from setbacks or disappointments, and move on. It’s the ability to cope. And it’s important. Research indicates that resilient people are more healthy and productive, and less likely to be absent from work. Resilience is a great quality – and it’s one that can be learned and developed!

So what can you do to become more resilient? Here are a few suggestions:

  • Don’t be so hard on yourself. A lot of people are pretty hard on themselves and engage in negative “self-talk.” For instance, if something goes wrong, they might think, “I’m so stupid. I’m always making mistakes.” If you have a tendency to have these types of thoughts, try to put a stop to them. Replace the negative thoughts with facts. For instance, if you make a mistake, think, “No one is perfect. I will fix this mistake.”
  • Find a relaxing spot and spend some time there occasionally. If there’s a quiet place at work where you can go now and then to relax, take the time to do it. If there isn’t, conjure up a relaxing scene in your mind and picture yourself there. It will help you to relax and decompress.
  • Be nice to your coworkers. Smile at them, ask questions, and listen to what they have to say. Your coworkers will most likely respond in a positive, friendly fashion, which will help to improve your mood and productivity.
  • Go for a walk with your coworkers. Walking with your coworkers will help you to build stronger relationships with them. And people with strong relationships have better resilience.
  • Keep a log of the things that you’re grateful for. Focusing on these things will help you to feel strong and positive throughout the day.

 

Landro, L. (2016, February 16). Why learning to be resilient is good for your health. The Wall Street Journal, p. D2.

 

Eating With Your Coworkers

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Eating_With_Coworkers

I think most people believe that it’s good to take a lunch break – and the proper thing to do during that time is to eat with your coworkers. You should laugh! You should tell funny stories about your children and/or pets! You should bond! Because that’s the healthiest and most relaxing thing to do, right?

Not necessarily. Research indicates that the best thing to do during your lunch break is whatever you want to do. Do you want to take a walk outside by yourself? Do you want to take a nap in your car? Do you want to work at your desk? Do it! Researchers have found that people feel most satisfied and rested when they are able to choose what they want to do with their lunch break. If you feel forced to work at your desk while you eat, then it’s detrimental to your mood and health. But if you actually want to work at your desk while you eat, then it’s the right thing to do. Choosing how you want to spend your time is the most important factor.

So if you don’t want to eat with your coworkers, that’s OK. They’ll get over it. Do what you want with your lunch break. It’s your time. You choose!

 

Linn, A. (2013, October 9). Why lunch with your colleagues could be stressing you out. Today Money. Retrieved from http://www.today.com/money/why-lunch-your-colleagues-could-be-stressing-you-out-8C11339490

 

Having a Bad Day? Here’s How to Make It Better.

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Bad_Day

Everyone has a terrible day once in a while. It’s that day when you lose your keys, you feel overwhelmed at work, you spill coffee all over your favorite shirt, and your cat throws up on your white carpet. It’s the kind of day when nothing seems to go right.

When you’re in the middle of a terrible day, it often seems like there’s nothing that can make it better. But actually, there are almost always things that you can do to improve your situation – at least a little bit.

Here are four ways to make a bad day a little bit better.

  1. Remind yourself that your luck will change. Even if everything seems to be going wrong at the moment, remind yourself that it’s only a temporary condition. Your luck will change for the better eventually!
  2. Be good to yourself. We often tend to be our worst critics. So when things go wrong, we often tell ourselves that we’re stupid, clumsy, or incompetent. Try to avoid that kind of thing if you can. Be kind to yourself and cut yourself a little slack.
  3. Give yourself a treat. Is there a little something that you can do to make yourself feel better? Maybe buy yourself a tasty snack, go for a walk around your neighborhood, or take a hot bath? Do something for yourself that will bring you a little enjoyment. (And if you’re not sure what that might be, spend a little time thinking about it. Come up with a list of five activities that bring you pleasure so you’re ready for the next terrible day that comes along!)
  4. Accomplish something. Get something done, even if it’s just a little thing. Neaten up your living room, hang a picture, or mow your front lawn. Accomplishing a task will make you feel better about yourself and the day in general.

 

Boyes, A. (2015, July 27). 5 tips for coping with a really bad day. Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/in-practice/201507/5-tips-coping-really-bad-day

 

Overcoming Failures at Work

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Feeling_Lousy_About_Failure

No one is perfect. And no matter how hard we might try, mistakes happen. Everyone, at one time or another, has experienced a failure at work. At my last job, I mistakenly infected the entire office with a computer virus just three days before my annual performance review was scheduled to take place. I’ll never forget it. It definitely wasn’t my finest moment!

Failure isn’t fun. It’s often upsetting and depressing. But we all experience it. So what can you do to overcome it? Here are a few suggestions:

  • Accept the fact that mistakes happen – Keep in mind that everyone experiences failures. This is especially true of people who are trying to do new, difficult, and challenging things.
  • Go ahead and feel upset – Don’t try to keep your emotions bottled up inside. If you do, they’ll probably just come out in other, damaging ways. (For instance, you might end up lashing out at friends or becoming increasingly negative about your work in general.) Take a couple days to be upset. It’s OK to wallow for a little while.
  • Talk to someone you trust – It’s a great way to sort out your feelings and release some stress. In addition, some feedback can help you to take a more balanced look at the event.
  • Think about what happened – Take some time to think about how or why the mistake happened. Be honest with yourself. It’s the only way that you can learn from the experience.
  • Learn from it – If you don’t learn from your mistake, you’ll most likely repeat it. So try to determine what you can do to avoid making the same mistake in the future.
  • Tackle a new project – Now it’s time to move on! Don’t forget about the failure (because it’s important to learn from it), but don’t dwell on it either. Take on a new project, and focus your efforts on it. Taking on a new challenge will help to dispel any lingering, negative emotions, and make you feel more positive and enthusiastic about your work.

 

Allan, P. (2014, June 30). How to move past failure. Lifehacker. Retrieved from: http://lifehacker.com/how-to-move-past-failure-1597951611

Young, G. (2014, September 4). 4 steps to overcoming failure and using it to your advantage. Fast Company. Retrieved from: http://www.fastcompany.com/3035120/how-to-be-a-success-at-everything/4-steps-to-overcoming-failure-and-using-it-to-your-advanta

 

I Don’t Trust You. Now What?

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Distrust

When you’re working with another person on a project, you need to have a certain amount of trust. You need to trust that your coworker will do his or her part, get it done right, and meet necessary deadlines.

But what if you don’t trust a certain coworker? How are you supposed to move forward? Author Paul White offers a few suggestions:

  • First, don’t view trust as something that’s “all or nothing.” Think of it as situational. You might trust your coworker to do certain tasks, but not trust him or her to do other things.
  • Next, try to identify the specific tasks or activities that you don’t trust your coworker to complete. Think about why you don’t trust your coworker to do these things. Is it because your coworker isn’t consistent and doesn’t get work done on time? Does your coworker lack the skills necessary to do certain tasks correctly?
  • Try to determine tasks that your coworker can be trusted to complete (maybe because your coworker is particularly skilled in these areas or because the tasks provide the kind of structure that will help your coworker to get the work done on time). If your coworker does well with these tasks, your trust will build.
  • Try to think of other ways that your coworker could prove his or her trustworthiness, and allow your coworker to take on these challenges.

If you can rebuild your trust, it will benefit you just as much as your coworker. It’s very difficult and stressful to work with someone whom you feel you can’t count on. But if you can find ways to trust your coworker, it will make your job easier – and help you to be happier and more productive.

 

White, P. (2015). Trust and be trusted. Talent Development, 69(11), 88-89.

 

Wash the Dishes — You’ll Feel Better

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DishesInSink

Feeling stressed at work? Not sure what you should do to relax? Well, here’s your answer. Go wash some dishes in your office kitchen.

A recent study suggests that washing dishes can be a relaxing experience – but only if you do it the right way. Here’s what researchers found:

  • Study participants who focused on the sensory aspects of the experience (including the slippery feel of the dishes, the smell of the soap, the warmth of the water, etc.) felt less nervous and more inspired after completing the task.
  • Study participants who only focused on washing the dishes properly experienced no change. If they were feeling lousy before washing the dishes, they felt just as lousy afterwards.

So go ahead and wash those dishes that your coworkers left in the sink! Just make sure you do it the right way. Take your time and really enjoy the soapy experience!

 

Lukits, A. (2015, September 29). Wash the Dishes While You Cleanse Your Mind. The Wall Street Journal, p. D4.

 

 

Four Ways to Boost Your Energy at Work

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TiredWorker

Work can be tiring. Even if you love your job, it can sometimes be difficult to stay energized throughout the day. So what should you do if you start to feel sleepy or sluggish? Well, you could drink a big cup of coffee. (I suspect that’s what most people do.) But you do have other options! Here are four of them:

  1. Take a break – Research has shown that people work more quickly and accurately if they take several short breaks throughout the day. So look away from your computer, stand up, and move around. You’ll feel better and get more done!
  2. Have a snack – Try to avoid sweets. They’ll give you a quick burst of energy, but it will die off quickly. Instead, choose a snack that’s high in protein and fiber. Good choices include things like string cheese with whole-grain crackers, an apple with peanut butter, or trail mix.
  3. Go for a walk – Taking a short, 10-minute walk can make you feel more energized, positive, and alert. If you can walk outside and get some fresh air, that’s even better.
  4. Take steps to reduce your stress – Stress is exhausting. So if you can, try to take steps to reduce it or remove it. You’ll have more energy – and be happier too!

If you have any other tips on how to stay mentally alert and energized during the workday, please share them in the Comments section below!

 

Fields, L. (2015, July 24). 6 quick ways to boost energy. WebMD. Retrieved from http://www.webmd.com/women/features/fatigue-fighters-six-quick-ways-boost-energy

 

The Link Between Decision Making and Happiness

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Making_A_Decision

How do you make big decisions? Do you do a lot of research, make lists of pros and cons, and spend hours pondering your options before finally making a choice? Or do you tend to be a little more spontaneous and trust your instincts?

According to psychologists, there are two types of people in the world: maximizers and satisficers.

  • Maximizers spend a lot of time and effort trying to make the “best” decision. They search for expert information, get advice from others, and really work to make a reasoned, logical choice.
  • Satisficers (a combination of the words “satisfy” and “suffice”) don’t put that much effort into their decisions. If a certain choice will satisfy their needs, they generally don’t feel the need to do much research or consider other options. They’ll just go with it.

Both approaches are certainly fine. Research indicates that maximizers and satisficers both make good decisions. But interestingly, psychologists have found that one group tends to be happier than the other.

Maximizers are not as happy as satisficers. Even after putting all that effort into making good decisions, maximizers will continue to second-guess themselves, and they’ll often feel bad about the choices they’ve made. In contrast, satisficers tend to be more content. They don’t question their decisions as much and they feel good about their choices.

I must admit that I’m a maximizer. I always do a lot of research and soul-searching before reaching a decision. And yes, I do second-guess myself afterwards. But if you’re a maximizer like me, don’t despair! Apparently, there’s hope for us! Researchers have found that as maximizers get older, they start to develop the qualities of a satisficer. They might still do a lot of research before making a decision, but they stop agonizing over choosing the perfect option and second-guessing their choices. They start to feel more content with things that may not be perfect, but are pretty darned good.

So what about you? Are you a maximizer or a satisficer? And do you think your decision-making style affects your happiness? Share your thoughts in the Comments section below!

 

Bernstein, E. (2014, October 7). Decide to be happy. The Wall Street Journal, pp. D1, D2.

Schwarz, B. (2004). The paradox of choice: Why more is less. New York, NY: Harper Perennial.

 

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