communication

The Importance of Feeling Safe

By in Communication Tags: , ,

Happy multi ethnic research team working together using laptop

Do you spend a lot of your time working on group projects? If you do, then you understand the importance of teamwork. In order to get things done, you and your coworkers need to communicate, respect each other, and coordinate your efforts. You also need to feel safe.

Researchers have found that in order for coworkers to collaborate effectively, they must feel “psychologically safe.” They must feel like they can voice their opinions, suggest new ideas, disagree with each other, and be honest without fear of retribution.

So what can you do to help create a psychologically safe work environment? Try the following:

  • Listen carefully – When your coworkers are talking, listen to what they’re saying. Pay attention, don’t interrupt, keep an open mind, and try to see things from their perspectives.
  • Feel free to disagree – It’s important to be respectful of others, but it’s also important to voice your opinions. If you don’t agree with something that a coworker says, you should say so. Disagreeing with your coworker doesn’t make you a disagreeable person. Everyone on the team should feel free to express their thoughts and ideas, even if they don’t align with someone else’s.
  • Be kind – It’s OK to disagree with someone. But you must make sure to voice your opinions in a calm, respectful manner. And don’t talk about other people behind their backs. It creates the kind of negative environment in which no one feels secure.
  • Admit to your mistakes – No one is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. If you own up to them, the other people on your team will see that it’s OK to make a misstep. They’ll feel more comfortable about extending themselves and trying new things.
  • Be goofy – Joke around with your coworkers. Laugh together. Go out as a group and do something fun. When you have a good time together, you form a bond and establish a foundation of trust.

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Braverman, B. (n.d.). The one quality that makes every team more effective – and how to foster it. The Muse. Retrieved from: https://www.themuse.com/advice/effective-teams-psychological-safety-in-the-workplace?ref=recently-published-0

Should You Be Honest With Your Boss?

By in Communication Tags: ,

Two young businesswomen at a meeting talking, close up

Life can sometimes be tough. We sometimes get sick. We sometimes get frustrated. And we sometimes experience losses and life changes that can make us feel sad, stressed, exhausted, or overwhelmed.

These types of things can have an impact on a person’s work. It can be hard to focus and be productive when you’re not feeling well, or when you’re having personal problems that are weighing on you.

So should you tell your boss when you’re going through a difficult time? Or is it better to keep it to yourself, and try to carry on as usual? According to author Nell Wulfhart, it depends on certain things:

  1. Your need for change – Does something need to change at work because of the personal problems you’re experiencing? Maybe you need to shift your work hours, take time off, or make adjustments to a few of your deadlines? If so, this would be a good reason to talk to your boss. But you should wait until you’re really certain about the changes that need to be made.
  2. Your boss’s ability to help – Does your boss actually have the ability to make changes? Can your boss adjust your deadlines or lighten your workload? Or is this beyond the scope of his or her power? If your boss can’t actually help you, it’s probably not necessary to talk to him or her about what you’re going through. It might be better to get some support from a sympathetic coworker instead.
  3. The quality of your work – Are your personal problems having an effect on the quality of your work? If so, you should definitely talk to your boss about it and explain why it has been happening. But if the quality of your work is unchanged, there may be no need to have a discussion.
  4. The nature of your relationship – What kind of relationship do you have with your boss? Do you talk to each other about your lives outside of work? Do you know anything about your boss’s family members, pets, or hobbies? If so, then you have the kind of boss who would probably be open to hearing about your problems. If not, then it might be kind of difficult and awkward to have a discussion about personal issues. You might feel more comfortable talking to an HR representative or a different departmental leader.     

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Wulhart, N. (n.d.). Should you tell your boss about your personal problem? Ask yourself these 5 questions first. The Muse. Retrieved from: https://www.themuse.com/advice/tell-boss-about-personal-problem?ref=recently-published-0

How to Work With People Who Are Younger Than You

By in Communication, Learning Tags: , ,

Multiethnic group of happy young business people standing in office

If you’re surrounded by coworkers who are younger than you, you may sometimes feel a little disconnected from them. People in different generations have their own ways of communicating and getting things done. So it may occasionally feel challenging to work together as a cohesive team.

But if you find yourself in this position, don’t worry. According to author Lindsey Pollak, there are five things that you can do to bridge the gap between you and your younger colleagues.

  1. Talk about how you prefer to communicate – Don’t just assume that everyone at work is going to share information in the same way. You might prefer to email, while your younger coworkers might prefer to text or skype. Talk to your coworkers about how they want to share information at work, and identify a form of communication that works for all of you.
  2. Be open to learning new things – Try not to cling to your “tried and true” ways of doing things – even if they’ve been effective in the past. Be open to new ideas and methods, and have a willingness to learn.
  3. Ask for guidance – Even though you may be the person in the office with the most experience, it’s still OK to ask your younger coworkers for guidance on how to use new techniques or forms of technology. It’s a great way to learn and form closer ties with your colleagues.
  4. Stay current – Try to stay up-to-date on what’s going on in pop culture. You don’t have to be an expert, but if you can understand what people are talking about in the lunchroom, that will help you to forge closer bonds.
  5. Don’t make “I’m so old” jokes – Don’t put yourself down by talking about how you’re “getting forgetful in your old age,” you’re “getting senile,” or anything along those lines. Be confident in what you know and what you can do. Your coworkers will respect you and your abilities.

Pollak, L. (n.d.). How to relate to your coworkers when they’re all younger than you. The Muse. Retrieved from: https://www.themuse.com/advice/working-with-younger-employees?ref=recently-published-1

Three Things That Great Leaders Do Regularly

By in Leadership Tags: , ,

Line_of_Ducks

At a lot of companies, leaders say that they’re there to serve the shareholders and make a profit. But according to author Marcel Schwantes, the best and most successful leaders feel like they’re there to serve their employees. If their employees are happy and productive, the customers will be happy with the services that they’re receiving, and the business will thrive. Great leaders need to care about their employees and show them that their work is valued and appreciated.

So how is this done? What should great leaders do to show their employees that they care, and ensure that their employees are happy and productive? Here are three things that every leader should do regularly:

  1. Talk to your employees about what they like to do best – Get to know your employees and find out what they like to do. And then let them do it. Employees do their best work (and are the most productive) when they’re allowed to focus on the tasks that make them feel engaged and happy.
  2. Acknowledge the work that your employees do – Don’t just praise the people who are working on the high-profile projects. Everyone on your team is contributing to the company’s success. Let them know that you can see the work that they do, and you appreciate it.
  3. Allow your employees to grow and change – If your employees become interested in different aspects of the business and would like to start taking on new types of projects, you should seriously consider it. Even if they’ve been very successful in their current roles, you should give them the chance to branch out. Allow your employees to start moving into new roles, and give them opportunities to take on new responsibilities. Your employees will be much less likely to leave and take a job somewhere else if they’re able to stretch their wings in their current positions.

 

Schwantes, M. (2019, May 9). How can you spot really good leaders? They are known for doing these 3 things daily. Inc. Retrieved from: https://www.inc.com/marcel-schwantes/how-to-spot-really-good-leaders-known-for-3-things-daily.html

How to Stop Oversharing at Work

By in Communication Tags: , , ,

Talking_Cat

It’s great to get along with your coworkers. It makes it so much easier to collaborate and get things done. In addition, research indicates that people with friends at work are more focused, happy, healthy, and engaged. Work is so much better when friends are involved!

So it makes sense to talk to your coworkers about what’s going on in your life. It’s a way to bond with them. You chat about the cool movie you saw over the weekend, describe what you ate for dinner last night, and show off pictures of your adorable cat. But you also need to be careful not to overshare.

Oversharing happens when you reveal too much personal information, and it starts to feel uncomfortable. You may be the one who is oversharing, or you may be the one listening to someone else overshare. Either way, it’s awkward.

Oversharing at work is generally not a good idea. You don’t want to feel uncomfortable or make your coworkers feel uncomfortable. Luckily, author Monica Torres is here to offer some suggestions on how to avoid oversharing and stop it when it starts.

How to avoid becoming an oversharer:

  • Only talk about things that you would be comfortable hearing from someone else. Are you about to launch into a long story about your latest medical procedure? Stop for a minute and think about whether you’d feel comfortable hearing this type of story from someone else. If the answer is “no,” keep it to yourself.
  • Be a little more private with people that you don’t know that well yet. If you don’t know your coworkers that well, work on building your relationships with them. But stick to safe subjects, like your adorable cat. Hold off on revealing the really personal stuff until you know them better.
  • Don’t post super-personal stuff online if your coworkers and managers will be able to see it. People sometimes feel a little uninhibited when they’re posting online. But if everyone from work can see what you’re sharing, make sure you don’t go too far.

How to stop someone else from oversharing:

  • Admit that you’re feeling a little uncomfortable. Thank your coworker for being so open and honest with you. But also tell your coworker that you’re feeling a little uncomfortable because you feel like he or she is telling you more than you should probably know.
  • Change the subject. If openly telling your coworker that he or she is oversharing sounds too difficult, then try a less direct approach. When your coworker starts to reveal way too much information, redirect the conversation by bringing up a new, less-personal topic.

 

Torres, M. (2019, February 28). How to deal with an oversharer at work (and stop yourself from becoming one). HuffPost. Retrieved from: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/oversharing-at-work-how-to-stop-an-oversharer_l_5c7412f6e4b06cf6bb29139b

 

Want Valuable Feedback? Try the “Start-Stop-Continue” Method.

By in Communication, Leadership Tags: , ,

Creative team at work

If you’re a manager, then you’re probably responsible for providing your team members with feedback – perhaps during annual performance reviews. But it’s also important to ask your team members to provide you with feedback. To be an effective leader, you need to know if you’re providing your team with the tools and information that they need to be effective and productive.

But just asking your team members “how am I doing?” is probably not the best approach. Most team members will probably respond by saying something like “good” or “fine.” They probably won’t provide specifics. And they might be afraid to say anything critical.

So if you’d like to get valuable feedback, it’s best to avoid asking general questions like “how am I doing?” Instead, provide your team with some structure, and ask them three questions:

  1. What should I start doing?
  2. What should I stop doing?
  3. What should I continue to do?

This “start-stop-continue” method will encourage your team members to provide you with specific information and concrete examples. You’ll come away with suggestions that you can actually put into action. And your team members will appreciate your effort! They’ll feel like they’re really being heard and recognize that their opinions matter.

 

Getting Feedback from Students. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.bu.edu/ctl/teaching-resources/start-stop-continue/

Confidence Boosters

By in Communication Tags: ,

Talking_Confidently

Would you like to sound confident when talking to clients, managers, and coworkers – even if you don’t feel confident? Would you like other people to view you as knowledgeable, trustworthy, and authoritative? If so, author Jayson Demers suggests that you try these simple techniques:

  • Speak slowly – Speaking quickly can make you sound nervous, and you’ll be more likely to stumble over your words. In contrast, if you speak slowly, you’ll have time to choose your words carefully, and everything you say will sound more weighty and important.
  • Take pauses – When you pause while speaking, it gives you the chance to gather your thoughts and take a deep breath (if you’re feeling anxious). Pauses also make you sound relaxed and confident. They can be used to build suspense and emphasize a certain key point. And they give your listeners the chance to absorb and process what you’re saying.
  • Don’t go off on tangents – When you go off on a tangent, you run the risk of looking scattered, nervous, and disorganized. So don’t tell that adorable story about your cat unless it’s actually relevant. Stay focused on the topic at hand.
  • Lower your voice – People who speak with a low tone of voice tend to be viewed as more knowledgeable and trustworthy. So try to bump yours down just a bit. Don’t go too far, or you’ll probably sound weird. But if you go just a tiny bit lower than usual, it can have a positive effect.
  • Stand up straight – Posture is important! People will respect you more if you stand up straight with your shoulders back, your head held high, and your arms at your sides.
  • Gesture a lot – Don’t just wave your hands around. That would be strange. But you should use hand gestures to draw attention to what you’re saying and emphasize important points. It will help you to appear more confident and make your words seem more important.

It’s also a good idea to practice using these techniques. The more comfortable you become with them, the more effective they’ll be! Good luck!

 

Demers, J. (n.d.). The 7 best tricks to sounding confident (even when you’re not). The Muse. Retrieved from: https://www.themuse.com/advice/the-7-best-tricks-to-sounding-confident-even-when-youre-not

 

How to Deal With an Angry Client

By in Communication Tags: , , , ,

Angry_Cat

Have you ever been faced with an angry customer or client? No matter what, it’s probably going to be tense and stressful. But you can make the situation less upsetting if you’re prepared. You need to know how to handle angry clients, mitigate their anger, and resolve the situation (if possible).

Follow these steps:

  1. Stay calm. Even if your clients are angry or yelling, don’t respond in kind. Take a deep breath, control your emotions, and keep a pleasant look on your face.
  2. Don’t take it personally. It’s hard not to get upset when clients are yelling at you and possibly criticizing something that you’ve worked hard on. But try to remember that even though you’re doing quality work, people often have different opinions about how things should be done. It’s not a reflection on you or your skills.
  3. Listen. When people are angry, they need to vent. They need to express why they’re angry and feel like they’re being heard. So listen to what your clients are saying. Don’t interrupt, cross your arms, or look impatient. Make eye contact, nod as your clients are speaking, and give them the opportunity to fully explain why they’re angry.
  4. Be sympathetic and apologize. After your clients have had the chance to express their feelings, show some sympathy. Tell them that you can understand why they’re unhappy. And then, even if it’s not your fault, apologize. Tell your clients that you’re sorry that they experienced this situation.
  5. Figure out a solution. Focus on what will make your clients happy and what you can do to make them pleased and satisfied. Ask your clients to be specific about what they think should be done. Remember to stay calm and positive. You might not be able to resolve the situation right away, but tell your clients that you’re going to make an effort to make things better.
  6. Take a break. After dealing with angry clients, you’ll probably feel physically and emotionally drained. So talk to a friendly coworker, take a short walk, or make yourself a cup of tea. Allow yourself a few minutes to relax and regroup.

 

Newtek. (2013, August 2). 7 steps for dealing with angry customers. Forbes. Retrieved from: https://www.forbes.com/sites/thesba/2013/08/02/7-steps-for-dealing-with-angry-customers/#6725c5b66d27

 

The One Thing You Should Do to Make Your Coworkers Like You

By in Communication Tags: , , ,

Friends

It’s so important to be on good terms with your coworkers. When people have good relationships at work, they’re happier and more productive. They’re more likely to collaborate, share ideas, be creative, and enjoy the work that they do.

So what should you do to make your coworkers like you? According to research, the answer is simple – you should ask them questions.

When you ask people questions and really listen to their answers, you form a bond. You create a feeling of trust and connection. And that’s an important foundation for any relationship.

But the way that you ask questions is important! Getting too personal too quickly is a big misstep. So is asking questions in an angry tone or not really listening to the person’s answer. If you want your coworkers to like you, you need to ask questions the right way. Try following these four steps:

  1. Start with simple questions – Don’t begin by asking your coworker a really personal, tough, or challenging question. You may be seen as abrasive or intrusive. Start out with simple questions and build from there.
  2. Use a friendly tone of voice – Don’t be too formal or curt when asking questions. People respond better to questions asked in a friendly, casual manner. If you use a warm tone of voice, your coworkers will most likely be warm and friendly in return.
  3. Ask open-ended questions – There’s nothing wrong with asking people questions that they can answer with a simple “yes” or “no.” But when you ask open-ended questions that require a more detailed response, you’ll be more likely to learn valuable new information and form a connection.
  4. Ask follow-up questions – Follow-up questions are essential! When you ask follow-up questions, you’re demonstrating to your coworkers that you’ve been paying attention and you care about what they have to say. Your coworkers will most likely appreciate your interest and respond by being even more friendly, open, and honest.

 

Koulopoulos, T. (2018, July 22). Harvard study reveals one word is the secret to being likeable and emotionally intelligent. Inc. Retrieved from: https://www.inc.com/thomas-koulopoulos/harvard-study-reveals-that-one-word-is-secret-to-being-likable-emotionally-intelligent.html

 

How to Criticize Someone Nicely

By in Communication Tags: , ,

Criticizing

It’s so hard to criticize a coworker or manager. Even if you think that your feedback would be helpful, you’re still saying something negative – and it could easily cause the person to become upset and defensive.

But what if it can’t be avoided? Is it possible to deliver constructive criticism without hurting anyone’s feelings? Author Susan Steinbrecher believes it can be done. Just follow these seven steps:

  1. Get permission – Ask the person if it would be OK if you shared an idea or suggestion. You might say something like, “Do you have a minute to talk about…?” It’s a polite thing to do. And if it’s not a good time, it would be better if you waited. If the person is busy or distracted, he or she is not likely to be receptive to what you have to say.
  2. Be balanced – Sure, you’ve got some negative things to say. But try to balance them out by saying positive things as well. And if you do pay the person a compliment, don’t immediately follow up with a “but.” (For example, “You do great work, but the clients think you’re difficult.”) Your compliment will be lost. All the person will hear is the criticism.
  3. Highlight the benefits – Why are you criticizing this person? How will your suggestions benefit that person, your working relationship, or the project that you’re both working on? Talk about the benefits of your ideas. You might be criticizing this person, but it’s for the best!
  4. Choose your words carefully – Say “I” rather than “you.” (For example, you should say “I feel unhappy when…” rather than “You make me feel unhappy when…”) Focus on the present rather than dredging up the past. And don’t use words like “always” or “never.” Saying things like “You always do this” or “You never do that” will only make the person feel angry and defensive.
  5. Prepare and practice – Work out what you want to say before you talk to the person. And then practice saying it. Run it by a trusted friend or coworker to see what he or she thinks of your message and delivery.
  6. Do it in person – Talk to the person face-to-face. If that’s not possible, talk on the phone. Definitely don’t send a text or an email. Written messages can easily be misinterpreted.
  7. Stay calm and keep an open mind – After you’ve delivered your prepared statement, the person might respond by providing you with some constructive criticism. Try to stay calm and listen carefully. Be open to what the person has to say and embrace the suggestions that seem helpful.

 

Steinbrecher, S. (2017, April 18). How to criticize anyone (yes, even your boss) and maintain your relationship. Inc. Retrieved from: https://www.inc.com/susan-steinbrecher/how-to-criticize-anyone-yes-even-your-boss-and-maintain-your-relationship.html

 

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